During the holiday season, cancer patients get a lot of well-intentioned but unhelpful advice. Here's how to make it stop.
PUBLISHED November 01, 2017
Martha lives in Illinois and was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer in January 2015. She has a husband and three children, ranging in age from 12 to 18, a dog and a lizard.
Even after nearly three years of ongoing treatment for metastatic breast cancer, there is always someone new — and often someone again — telling me how I can cure myself.
I’m not a confrontational person and I understand that usually the person instructing me on mistakes I’ve made or changes I could make is doing so out of love and concern. I don’t want to get in an argument. I don’t want to hurt feelings or sound strident about what I know from paying attention over the past three years.
I sometimes choose to remain silent as someone explains about diets or vitamins or cider or whatever “cure” is currently making the rounds on social media. I get it. Before my diagnosis, whenever confronted by a person with cancer, I’d silently reassure myself that could never be me. I was too young. I mostly ate the right things. I exercised.
I’m not a confrontational person and I understand that usually the person instructing me on mistakes I’ve made or changes I could make is doing so out of love and concern. I don’t want to get in an argument. I don’t want to hurt feelings or sound strident about what I know from paying attention over the past three years.
I sometimes choose to remain silent as someone explains about diets or vitamins or cider or whatever “cure” is currently making the rounds on social media. I get it. Before my diagnosis, whenever confronted by a person with cancer, I’d silently reassure myself that could never be me. I was too young. I mostly ate the right things. I exercised.
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