As a person with metastatic cancer, I've surrendered a lot of my autonomy. Pay attention when I say I don't need your help.
PUBLISHED August 21, 2018
Martha lives in Illinois and was diagnosed with metastatic breast cancer in January 2015. She has a husband and three children, ranging in age from 12 to 18, a dog and a lizard.
I've never liked being told what to do. As a kid, teachers and other parents probably saw me as a "good kid." But they didn't know about my silent and undercover rebellions – signing myself out of high school at any opportunity, teaching my younger sister how to correctly forge our mom's signature, refusing to listen to the swim coach who thought she knew best. I wasn't a rebel who got in trouble, but I wanted to make up my own mind about how I would respond to events in my life and pity the person who had good intentions but didn't understand that "power" to me meant being able to make my own choices.
So, I guess it's no surprise that being told what to do by doctors is just not the way I can handle the medical care I need as a person with metastatic breast cancer. I've declined medication for chemotherapy-induced peripheral neuropathy (the recommended drug has potential side effects that worry me for very specific personal reasons). I've worked hard to convince my hematology oncologist – who is an additional doctor I "won" after developing blood clots around a since-removed port – to take me off daily self-administered shots of blood thinner in favor of a relatively new tablet. I review my scans and visit notes and try to know what my options are and be prepared to speak up if and when that time comes.
So, I guess it's no surprise that being told what to do by doctors is just not the way I can handle the medical care I need as a person with metastatic breast cancer. I've declined medication for chemotherapy-induced peripheral neuropathy (the recommended drug has potential side effects that worry me for very specific personal reasons). I've worked hard to convince my hematology oncologist – who is an additional doctor I "won" after developing blood clots around a since-removed port – to take me off daily self-administered shots of blood thinner in favor of a relatively new tablet. I review my scans and visit notes and try to know what my options are and be prepared to speak up if and when that time comes.
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