Has Cancer Made Me Any Less of a Woman?

After losing both my breasts and uterus, I found myself wondering what it means to be a woman.

BY Tamera Anderson-Hanna

PUBLISHED February 12, 2018

Tamera Anderson-Hanna is a Licensed Mental Health Counselor, Certified Addiction Professional, Certified Rehabilitation Counselor and became a Registered Yoga Teacher while coping with breast cancer in 2015. She owns Wellness, Therapy, & Yoga in Florida where she provides personal wellness services and coaching and she is a public speaker on wellness-related topics. You can connect with her at www.wellnesstherapyyoga.com.

I experienced a preventative hysterectomy at age 40 and then had a double mastectomy after a diagnosis of breast cancer at age 44. After losing both breasts and my uterus, I found myself wondering what it means to be a woman.

For years, I suffered extreme pain due to endometriosis. I endured the pain because I wanted to have children. It was not uncommon to experience pain that felt like someone was ringing out my internal organs, much like we ring out a dishcloth. Simultaneously, I felt as if I was being kicked in the gut with a steel-toed boot. My pregnancies were difficult, and I was high risk with each pregnancy due to the fact I would experience preterm labor.

It wasn't until I was 40 and had two children that I finally agreed to even discuss and consider having a hysterectomy. I agreed to the procedure and likely had a fortunate outcome following the results of a biopsy. The biopsy indicated that there were cells in my uterus which were indicative of cancer. I grieved after my hysterectomy. I was free of what had become excruciating pain off and on for years, but I was no longer going to be able to have children. A concerning thought crossed my mind. Am I less of a woman for no longer being able to have children? While I wasn't necessarily planning to have more children after the years of complications, I experienced a range of emotions, including grief for losing the ability to have children, and anger for feeling that my own body had potentially turned against me, thereby taking away the ability to have more children.

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