Thursday, November 1, 2018

Turning My Back On The Past

Would would happen if I turned my back to the past and faced forward? It is time to stop wishing I could go back to my pre-cancer life. It's time to face forward.

BY Dana Stewart

PUBLISHED November 01, 2018

Dana Stewart was diagnosed with breast cancer in 2010 at the age of 32. She is the co-founder of a cancer survivorship organization called The Dragonfly Angel Society. She volunteers as an advocate and mentor, focusing on young adults surviving cancer. She enjoys writing about life as a cancer survivor, as well as connecting survivors to the resources, inspirations and stories that have helped her continue to live her best life, available at www.dragonflyangelsociety.com.

I have gotten quite good at living in the past. Ever since my breast cancer diagnosis eight years ago, I have made cancer my constant companion. Sure, the diagnosis was a long time ago. Sure, the doctors have told me all my treatment is done and I can go on with my life. The problem is I want the life I left behind. When everyone tells me that I should go on with my life, I don't know what that means. To me, my life is back a little over eight years ago, before I was told I had cancer. That's the life I want to go on with. I want to pick it up and be just like I was.

This whole thought process is where the "new normal" after cancer is supposed to take the spot light. It's supposed to guide us forward and show us how to get on with our changed lives. The problem for me is that I couldn't accept it. I didn't like the new normal. I didn't like what it stood for. I am very goal-oriented. When I was diagnosed, I put together a plan with my medical team of everything that had to be done and the timing for all the treatment. I marked off the days until my goal would become a reality. That day was my last day of chemo treatment. My surgeries were done. My chemo was done. That was the day I could run back to my pre-cancer self, give her a big hug and feel the elation of being reunited.

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Tip of the Day: Invite your family into the kitchen

Tip of the Day: November 1, 2018

Invite your family into the kitchen!

Divide jobs among family members and remember -- kids love to be in the kitchen, too! With help, you can get more done and have more time to enjoy with your family.

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From The Editor of New Focus Daily– Festively Fall

New post on New Focus Daily

From The Editor – Festively Fall

by Karen Shayne

A “festively fall” welcome to New Focus Daily (NFD) new readers, AND welcome back to our regular readers. Our theme this month is “’Giving Thanks,” and we are in the midst of JUST getting started with one of the BEST times of the year, full of celebration, festivities, friends, family, and giving thanks. There are […]

Wednesday, October 31, 2018

The Mystery of Transformation

Remembering a loved one's spirit in a new way can bring healing and hope.

BY Diana M. Martin

PUBLISHED October 31, 2018

Diana M. Martin has been an adjunct professor in The Writing and Reading Center at Montgomery College in Rockville, MD, for over 10 years. She has a MFA in Creative Nonfiction and has published articles in the areas of parenting, health and cultural arts. When her husband lost his battle with cancer of unknown primary, later identified as bile duct cancer, she became the sole caregiver for their adult son, Alex, who is autistic.

My husband, Dan, died three years ago on Nov. 20, 2015. Every year since then, on his birthday and on the anniversary of his death, I have done something to remember him. This year I am struggling with what to do.

I've given many donations to causes, planted trees and flowers, sent lighted crosses to family to place on his grave site in SD, and even had a play dedicated to him. I've celebrated his commitment to sobriety in private and with a group of his friends. We've raised our glasses to him at holidays. Yesterday at a friend's wedding, I brought a photo of us on our wedding day, more than 25 years ago, so he would be there with me in spirit.

Even at work, Dan's spirit follows me around. As a professor, when one of my students writes about caring for or losing a spouse or family member with cancer, I give a knowing look of empathy and try hold back tears. For our son's 25 birthday, I presented him with one of his father's rings. Alex, our son, is autistic and recently had a hard time identifying his dad in a photo. This made me want to sob uncontrollably. I know it is only a function of his autism, and that his dad's spirit also lives within him. They even look alike and walk the same way. I told a counselor and she agreed, but it was still heart wrenching. If we don't keep a person's spirit alive, is it as if he or she never existed?

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What is inflammatory breast cancer? NEW on Living Well Blog

Inflammatory breast cancer is a type of breast cancer that is both rare and presents with different warning signs. This type of breast cancer accounts for about 1% to 5% of breast cancers in the United States. Inflammatory breast cancer, also called IBC, tends to be an aggressive and fast-paced cancer.

With IBC, it is important to know that the warning signs can be very different from the traditional breast cancer signs. It is less common with IBC that you will be able to feel a lump in the breast. Some of the warning signs include:

Swelling or enlargement
Change in the color of the breast, can be red, pink or purple tones
Dimpling of skin
Pulling in of the nipple

Additionally, these symptoms tend to arise quickly over the course of weeks or months. With other forms of breast cancer, symptoms tend to occur on a much less rapid timeline and can occur over the course of years.

Mammograms may not show IBC due to appearance as inflammation or skin thickening and due to the rapid onset of the cancer. Sometimes, IBC is mistaken as an infection, however any symptoms that last longer than a week should be discussed with your doctor. It is also important to remember to perform regular breast self-awareness and self-exams as this can lead to earlier detection.

There is a 30% rate of metastasis diagnosis with the initial diagnosis of IBC. With treatment, 65% of women who are diagnosed with IBC will live at least 5 years. Of these women, 35% will have no sign of breast cancer after 10 years from the initial diagnosis. Unfortunately these prognosis numbers are not as high as they are for women with other forms of cancer. However, clinical trials and improved rates of self-awareness testing can help lead to earlier detection and better treatment options.

Want to learn more about IBC? Click here.

Source: Susan G. Komen

touroinfirmary | October 30, 2018 at 5:00 am | Categories: 31 Days of Pink | URL: https://wp.me/p3U9Kg-zC

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Health, Healing and Halloween

How I battle the beast of breast cancer.

BY KHEVIN BARNES

PUBLISHED OCTOBER 30, 2018

Khevin Barnes is a Male Breast Cancer survivor, magician and speaker. He is currently writing, composing and producing a comedy stage musical about Male Breast Cancer Awareness. He travels wherever he is invited to speak to (and do a little magic for) men and women about breast cancer. www.BreastCancerSpeaker.com www.MaleBreastCancerSurvivor.com

Halloween has always been my favorite holiday. Despite the zombies, vampires, witches and ghosts that symbolize the celebration, there is a kind of trust and confidence that we, as children, learn to identify with in the face of all that spookiness.

Somehow the sight of gruesome and disfigured beings loses its power, and we learn to accept the harmlessness of the horror.

So why is it that I am still sometimes reluctant to show my mastectomy scar at our public pool? I realize that being a man with breast cancer, as far as the social and emotional responses go, is very different than being a woman, so I can only speak of my own experience here. I have never felt personally self-conscious about my missing left breast, and I talk openly and even passionately about breast cancer to everyone who expresses an interest, but I sometimes fall into the trap of assuming that other people are uncomfortable with what might be seen as my "disfigurement."

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Tip of the Day: Autumn flies by in a flash!

Autumn flies by in a flash!

Take advantage of outdoor activities such as hiking, soccer, flag football, or playing in the leaves! Do something different today, switch it up!